Random Thoughts

So happy to be back with him, I don't even mind the Sounders brainwashing.

In case you were wondering, yes, I am back home on the couch (where I truly belong), blogging in my pajamas at ten am.  And here is a riveting list of things I woke up thinking about: 

1. My devil cold has now morphed into a disgusting cough and last night I could not stop coughing.  RJ passive aggressively sighed me out of bed, so I found myself on the couch watching the Food Network at 11pm.  I suddenly became starving and made a huge plate of nachos.  And ate two packs of fruit snacks.  No more late night Food Network is the moral of this story.  Oh and this morning I got a text from RJ that said, "I love you, I'm sorry I sighed you out of bed last night.  If it makes you feel better I had a really bad dream after you left."  It does make me feel better. 

2. I really want a gold, pharmacy floor lamp for our family room, but they are all so expensive.  Why can't I find one that looks like this for about 300 dollars less than that?

3. The other night RJ popped his head out of his office and goes, "I know you're going to hate me, but is your birthday the 14th or the 16th of April?" Um, seriously??  "Neither, you jerk," I replied.  For the record- and someone please tell my husband this by the way- it's the 10th.  You know, if we had to pass one of those "how well do you know your mate" tests to get a green card, we would totally fail, ALL THANKS TO HIM.  And then one of us would get deported, and our love would be torn apart, all because he can't even remember my birthday.  Good thing we're both citizens, and this scenario is not real.

4. One of my least favorite things in the WORLD is when RJ makes me watch the instant replay on his football video games.  Just please.  I mean, I already support the addiction WAY too much as it is, I have to draw the line with FAKE PEOPLE AND NON-EXISTENT GAMES.  The worst is when he plays NCAA 13, and puts it on "coaching mode".  I really do believe that he thinks he's the coach of a real team, and actual humans are depending on him or something.  He talks to the players, screams at the TV...  The line between reality and video games is becoming very blurry in this house, I tell you what.  One day I will tape him talking to the TV, so you can truly understand.

5. I am in love with John Stewart.  My love grows every day, and I think RJ is getting for real jealous, because he tried to revoke my laminated list privileges when I remarked that I didn't even need five celebrities, I just wanted John Stewart's name on the list five times.   He said laminated lists were ridiculous, and he doesn't support me having one.  I mean, what is that?  I replied by saying, "Um, excuse me husband, you don't own me.  Don't tell me I can't have hypothetical cheating scenarios with a non-existent list.  Gosh."  The nerve of some spouses.

6. Taylor's album makes me wish I was going through a break-up so I could just be a dark and tortured soul as I listen to her music.  When you are happily married it can be hard to relate, you know what I mean?  Don't worry, I don't expect you to understand.  No one else has seemed to when I've made this remark, least of all RJ.  Can you believe that?  I mean, I support his football habits.  Sort of.

7. ButterNUT squash, and butterCUP squash are not the same thing, and don't let the stupid people on "cook's thesaurus" tell you that they are.  The LATTER happens to be a little bastard vegetable, that has more seeds, and shell than actual vegetable.  It will also take you 17 hours to peel and de-seed it, and when all is said and done you will have about two edible bites, and probably only nine fingers.  Let me save you some time- if they are out of butterNUT squash at the store, just change your menu plan.  Oh, and I highly recommend buying the prepared and packaged butternut squash.  Anyone who tells you that it's not worth the extra two bucks is a damn crazy person.

8. Whenever I ask RJ what he thinks about this frame, or that lamp, he gets a distressed look on his face and says, "Dear.  Can we please talk about this later?"  Which really means, "Just buy it, I don't care."  WIN WIN WIN, as Michael Scott would say.

Have a lovely day!