I'm a Mess

And here's why:

1. I am sick AGAIN.  Very sick.  What. The. Hell.  My immune system is such a hooker.  I take four months off and suddenly it's incapable of fending off ten year old germs.  So rude.  I'm also very confused, because I have been religiously eating seven two gummy vitamins a day, and since I started this little habit four weeks ago, I've been sick TWICE.  Hmmmmm..... I really think vitamins are all a bunch of hype.  But obviously I'm going to keep eating them because let's be real, they're basically gummi bears.  ANYWAY, I'm leaving school right at five, going to the store, buying Thera-flu nighttime, and going to bed at 6 pm.  Which is the advice my secret fave Sydnie whispered in my ear on her way out the door today.  "I suggest Theraflu for you.  And softer tissues because your nose is so red."  I love her.   

2. I bought these bracelets as a Christmas present for a friend, and then they came and I liked them so much I put them on and haven't taken them off.   They were also only ten dollars.  Check this store out, it's my new secret find for accessories.

#whatagrinch

3. Today I was doing reading tests in another room, and another teacher was was watching the class.  I came back to find broken crayons ALL OVER THE FLOOR.  After some "safe-space-truth-talks" I came to find out that pretty much the entire class was breaking crayons and chucking them at people's heads.  Oh you know, just for fun.  After a looongggg discussion about why we should stop acting like punks (those exact words were not used), and wasting money and school supplies, we decided to "cleanse" and start fresh with some yoga.  Wherein which I promptly put them in corpse position for about three minutes.  And it was such a calm, and lovely three minutes.

#teacheroftheyear. Totally.

Haha. This picture.  I can't even... I mean, just please.

  Also, last night I dreamed that I was BFF with Princess Kate and I was her favorite. (Sorry Pippa.)  We shopped for her baby, and joked about our husbands (oh that Wills) and it was pretty much the best dream ever. When I woke up I was so sad and depressed that it wasn't real.  And still kind of am.

I'm Alive!

Wow.  Let’s talk about what doesn’t go well together- TEACHING AND BLOGGING.  But you know what does go just swimmingly together?  Teaching and drinking.  The fourth grade team (who I’m obsessed with by the way, and do NOT want to leave) has been hitting the bottle lately.  Just kidding.  But not really.

Seriously though.  How do teachers find time to blog?  All those cutesy teacher blogs out there?  When do they do it?  I can’t even get it together and enter grades on time.  Maybe they blog while they teach.  Which (if you must know) I came dangerously close to doing on Friday.  But I showed some self-control professionalism.  I considered writing a teaching blog and sharing some of the activities we’ve been doing… but I then decided I needed to stay true to this blog’s roots.  And this blog is about narcissism.  And not working.  And making fun of my husband.  Don’t get me wrong, these children have been giving me LOTS of material for the latter, but I just don’t feel right selling out ten-year-olds for the sake of humor.  I’d much rather sell out my husband and make fun of the dumb-ass things he does.  So until I get back to having no job, and being around RJ, this blog is on a bit of a hiatus.

As much as I miss blogging, I really love teaching.  I need to go back to the classroom full time.  I feel so fortunate to have found a job that I truly love, and am passionate about.  

Project time!  How cute are they?  

One of my very favorites.  This girl has me wrapped around her finger, which is a problem when she is naughty.  Which is often.

We love The Watsons go to Birmingham!

Another heart stealer.  When she met RJ, she went up to him said, "Pleased to meet your acquaintance," and then she curtsied!  Haha.

This story cracked me up.  Kids are so funny

I am also so lucky to have the world’s greatest best friend who took in my homeless self, and puts up with me and my mess.  You should all go get yourselves a Sally Winchester.  She’s the best. 

Thanksgiving party

Favorite!

Also, RJ came and visited the kids on Friday, and they were all so cute together.  Of course, Friday afternoons = insanity, therefore I didn't take any pictures, so you'll just have to take my word for it.  Some of my favorite comments were, "Wow.  You're short.  I thought Ms. Lund liked tall guys,"  "How old are you?  29?  You look like a teenager!" "Do you work, or does Ms. Lund have to bring home all the money?"  That last one was my personal fave.  Heehee.  Oh, and I did change my name, but since I taught these kids last year, only about ten of them actually remember to call me Mrs. Alexander.  Anyway, RJ is such a saint because he spent three hours in the classroom helping me and hanging out with the kids, and then went to dinner with some of the fourth grade team, where teacher talk dominated the conversation pretty much the entire time.  Then we went to the ARISE Christmas party, where more teacher talk ensued.  He also sat through reflection (detention), and witnessed multiple children have epic meltdowns, and me yell.  Then he waited for me to have two parent conferences.  What a keeper.  I am obsessed with him.  

 I am also obsessed with gingerbread contests that end with your house looking like this:

We are so talented.

JUST KIDDING.

Would you like to see what our house making process really looked like?

We should have taken it as a sign, when we broke multiple pieces within the first five minutes.

Since carving the gingerbread wasn't working, we decided to use negative space.  With a random metal object we found in Amy's car.

We were trying to make St. Louis Cathedral, which in retrospect, may have been a tad ambitious.

At least there was free alcohol!

RJ said it looked like a refugee camp in Afghanistan.  RUDE.

And... THE END.  Sigh.  Maybe next year will go better.

Clearly, I'm obsessed with a lot of things in this blog, but most of all I am obsessed with you!  Thanks for still reading, even though I've been MIA for a million years.  Have a great Sunday!